PurpAnd

A while back I had been looking to compare the song ‘Viva La Vida’ by Cold Play to Joe Satriani’s song ‘If I Could Fly’ because Mr. Satriani says he was ripped off and I just wanted to see for myself.

I stumbled on this video below and felt it was worth sharing. This isn’t me, but I imagine this is what I look (and sound) like when I play.

I am such a nerd. I’m afraid I have been one for a really long time, but have tried to keep that side hidden from public view by announcing that I am into cool stuff like fancy cars or listening to Muse. Sort of like overcompensation, but not for anatomical reasons.

Well, I took a step further into nerdiness on Tuesday night during my trivia game. See, Tuesday’s are the day of the big Showdown game. The hour-long, Master of the Universe trivia game. One of the segments of the Showdown is a game called Categories. Before the questions are given, the players get to vote on one of two categories. The majority wins and a question from that category is provided.

One of the votes had these two choices: ‘String Theory’ and ‘Long Ago in Mexico.’ I assumed the latter had to do with Mexican history, certainly not my strong suit, so I chose String Theory. But it wasn’t the process of elimination that drove my decision. String Theory, and related topics, are things I am fascinated by, and as long as the game wasn’t going to generate a question about the world’s largest ball of twine, I would have had a good chance of dominating the category.

I was voted down and had to answer a question about some Mexican leader from 1,000 years ago that of course I got wrong. However, I was relieved to see that three questions later, we were again voting on String Theory as a possible category. This time it was against Rocket Men. Thinking Rocket Men was either about astronauts or Elton John’s past boyfriends, I knew my String Theory would again be voted down. In fact, I was voted down 7 to 1 and the question came up about the first man to orbit the Earth. Which, incidentally, I got right. (Did you know it took him less than two hours to go all the way around?)

I would have liked to see what questions String Theory would have given us, but I’ll have to wait for another time. But it is for this reason that I say my nerdiness has taken on a whole new dimension… I desperately wanted to be tested on my knowledge of quantum theories.

If I were in high school, I think I’d have to kick my own ass and shove myself into a garbage can.

I tend to think of myself as a pretty sarcastic person. I think much of my sense of humor is rooted in sarcasm. Fortunately for me, most of the people who know me understand this.

I’ve learned, over the years, to dial my sarcasm down in more sensitive scenarios. For example, sitting in my bosses office for my annual review was not the time for me to dryly mention how much fun it was to be berated with a seemingly endless list of my professional, and a few personal, faults.

I’ve also recognized that being sarcastic with someone I just met is usually not very well received. I can’t count the number of times I’ve jumped enthusiastically into a conversation only to be met with a blank stare 60 seconds later. Too often I’ve had to rescue myself by recoiling, explaining I was being sarcastic.

My favorite victims of my sarcasm are usually the ones who ‘get it.’ These people include my wife, my sister, and my mom. I have a few close friends too that get it more than others. One in particular, Joe, pretty much cracks up at everything I say and it encourages me more. Lately, I’ve been on this string of insulting telephone greetings. I’ll call him and when he picks up I’ll say something like, “If you were my son, I’d ask for my money back.” Or, “if you were my next door neighbor, I’d keep the terrorist watch hotline on my speed dial.” Gentle things like that.

My sister has a similar sense of humor. We get along great because of it, but sometimes when we are together we get the same confused look from people. She and I can dish it back and forth and will occasionally get carried away… thankfully, her fiance hasn’t been turned away by this.

In writing this post, I’ve found it difficult to adequately convey just how sarcastic I can be. For that, I am sorry. But look on the bright side, you get to look forward to the time when we meet in person… You know, at one of my book signings or when I come through your town as a lion tamer with the circus.